We
have quite a few firecrackers who are quick to set off sparks in our second
grade.
have quite a few firecrackers who are quick to set off sparks in our second
grade.
The intervention specialist approached me with an idea. She said, “Maybe a few could benefit from a group to help deal with
anger?”
anger?”
From there this plan began.
We brainstormed a few boys we thought would benefit from a
group like this. She saved me so much time and spoke to the teachers to make sure
there were no conflicts and all could meet up at the same time. She truly made
sure our group was complete.
group like this. She saved me so much time and spoke to the teachers to make sure
there were no conflicts and all could meet up at the same time. She truly made
sure our group was complete.
We were ambitious; we agreed to take on eight adorable
handfuls.
handfuls.
What were we thinking?
She coordinated with the teachers and managed to make the
timing of the group fit like a glove with my schedule. She was such a lifesaver
and instrumental in getting this group started. I am currently dealing with a ratio of 1:1200 of counselors to students. That’s a whole lot of them compared to very little of me. I’ll take all the help I can get.
timing of the group fit like a glove with my schedule. She was such a lifesaver
and instrumental in getting this group started. I am currently dealing with a ratio of 1:1200 of counselors to students. That’s a whole lot of them compared to very little of me. I’ll take all the help I can get.
She convinced the Assistant
Principal to print a colored workbook for each student. All I had to do was sort
the copies and make sure the pages were in order,
(I would print one copy at a time because it will print the
pages in order and you can skip this step. They would come out like they are in
this picture and you wouldn’t have to sort the individual pages, you’d just
pick it up and fold it in half avoiding any chance of getting pages out of
orderJ)
pages in order and you can skip this step. They would come out like they are in
this picture and you wouldn’t have to sort the individual pages, you’d just
pick it up and fold it in half avoiding any chance of getting pages out of
orderJ)
Fold the pages in half and staple down the side.
Our small group was ready to go! She’s a lifesaver.
Week One
Session 1
Tuesday, 35 minutes
My Intervention Specialist is the bomb. She was outside
waiting for the boys, counting down to the minute recess ended. She was excited
and ready to go. I walked up right as recess was ending and when it was time,
she called the boys and they excitedly bounced her way. Within 30 seconds of
recess finishing, she had the boys picked up from recess and lined up ready to
go. I instantly realized she was way better at managing a group than I am. I
could never have gotten them to be that compliant that quickly.
waiting for the boys, counting down to the minute recess ended. She was excited
and ready to go. I walked up right as recess was ending and when it was time,
she called the boys and they excitedly bounced her way. Within 30 seconds of
recess finishing, she had the boys picked up from recess and lined up ready to
go. I instantly realized she was way better at managing a group than I am. I
could never have gotten them to be that compliant that quickly.
I am thinking I am going to learn a lot from her.
We started walking, they started off calm and innocent,
until we walked about ten feet. Then, one was in the bushes, two were pushing
each other and one was spinning in circles. I’ve never done an all-boys group.
We’re in for an adventure.
until we walked about ten feet. Then, one was in the bushes, two were pushing
each other and one was spinning in circles. I’ve never done an all-boys group.
We’re in for an adventure.
We wrangled them and got to the conference room. It was the
only space big enough to accommodate the six (if all were present eight) boys
and two adults. It worked out pretty well, they felt so special in there. We
replaced the spinney chairs with their regular plastic chairs but they still
felt awesome sitting at the big conference table.
only space big enough to accommodate the six (if all were present eight) boys
and two adults. It worked out pretty well, they felt so special in there. We
replaced the spinney chairs with their regular plastic chairs but they still
felt awesome sitting at the big conference table.
For our first meeting together, we introduced ourselves,
went over the purpose of our group, and we came up with group norms/rules. One
of the rules that was said was, “Don’t flip off your teacher because they try
to help you.”
went over the purpose of our group, and we came up with group norms/rules. One
of the rules that was said was, “Don’t flip off your teacher because they try
to help you.”
I didn’t quite realize what I was signing myself up for.
The boys called out left and right and weren’t great at
raising their hands and waiting to be called on. They were very respectful
though. I was surprised at how quickly they said, “Yes ma’am” redirected
themselves and got quiet. They seemed very sweet, but I could see how they
could cause some commotion in a classroom.
raising their hands and waiting to be called on. They were very respectful
though. I was surprised at how quickly they said, “Yes ma’am” redirected
themselves and got quiet. They seemed very sweet, but I could see how they
could cause some commotion in a classroom.
At first, it was like herding stray kittens trying to get
these six to focus. It was quite a hilarious scene. She got those boys under control
quickly and really modeled how you can be firm yet loving. These boys are much
different than the girls I am used to. I’ve never had an all-boys group before;
I am excited for the challenge.
these six to focus. It was quite a hilarious scene. She got those boys under control
quickly and really modeled how you can be firm yet loving. These boys are much
different than the girls I am used to. I’ve never had an all-boys group before;
I am excited for the challenge.
Once everyone had their turn to talk, here’s the rules they
came up with:
came up with:
After we came up with our final rule we all signed and
circled our names. I thought that the signature would make them feel personally
accountable for upholding the rules. I liked their crooked smiles and the way
they strutted away from the board after they signed their names.
circled our names. I thought that the signature would make them feel personally
accountable for upholding the rules. I liked their crooked smiles and the way
they strutted away from the board after they signed their names.
They were
really proud.
really proud.
After the norms/rules were established, we took an anger
pretest. I wanted to see what specific areas they were struggling with to
better serve their needs and to be able to cater the examples used to help them
make necessary connections during our lessons.
pretest. I wanted to see what specific areas they were struggling with to
better serve their needs and to be able to cater the examples used to help them
make necessary connections during our lessons.
They were pretty spread out sitting at our large conference
table. A side benefit I hadn’t realized that came with using this room is
really honest answers from the boys. They were too far apart to copy off each
other or try to align their answers with those around them. They all seemed to
feel confident enough to answer honestly and we gathered some eye opening data.
table. A side benefit I hadn’t realized that came with using this room is
really honest answers from the boys. They were too far apart to copy off each
other or try to align their answers with those around them. They all seemed to
feel confident enough to answer honestly and we gathered some eye opening data.
It was a little heart breaking to see how many answers they
said yes to. It’s tough being so little with such big emotions.
said yes to. It’s tough being so little with such big emotions.
As a group, we read each question out loud and the boys
marked yes or no depending on if the statement applied to them. Once we read and answered the final question, they were done
for the day. They said their final ideas, we lined up and headed out.
marked yes or no depending on if the statement applied to them. Once we read and answered the final question, they were done
for the day. They said their final ideas, we lined up and headed out.
We walked them back to their classes and high fived when the
last one left us.
last one left us.
That went very well.
Session 2
Thursday, 35 minutes
The two students absent on Tuesday were here today. A
different two students were absent leaving us with six for the day. I think six
will be the max from here out. I know that there are two trained adults leading
this group and we could accommodate more boys, but I like the amount of one-on-one
attention we are able to provide in this setting. I think having a smaller
ratio of teachers to students allows the boys to explore their feelings deeper
by bouncing ideas off of us, and each other, in a more intimate setting.
different two students were absent leaving us with six for the day. I think six
will be the max from here out. I know that there are two trained adults leading
this group and we could accommodate more boys, but I like the amount of one-on-one
attention we are able to provide in this setting. I think having a smaller
ratio of teachers to students allows the boys to explore their feelings deeper
by bouncing ideas off of us, and each other, in a more intimate setting.
Once again, she had rounded them all up from recess and had
them ready to get started. Two boys were at a different playground so I went to
grab them. They were the two boys that were absent on Tuesday. “This is going
to be so boring. This better not be sooooo booorrringggggg.”
them ready to get started. Two boys were at a different playground so I went to
grab them. They were the two boys that were absent on Tuesday. “This is going
to be so boring. This better not be sooooo booorrringggggg.”
Thanks buddy.
Once we got everyone rounded up and situated in the
conference room, we started the second session by introducing ourselves to the
new members of the group. We went around the room and everyone said their name,
their teacher and their favorite animal (they chose that activity).
conference room, we started the second session by introducing ourselves to the
new members of the group. We went around the room and everyone said their name,
their teacher and their favorite animal (they chose that activity).
Then we broke into the good stuff. We passed out the
workbooks and they excitedly started talking about the character and the
colors. The other teacher and I met eyes and I gave her a silent well done. She
really did step the awesomeness of this group up by convincing admin to print
colored copies for us.
workbooks and they excitedly started talking about the character and the
colors. The other teacher and I met eyes and I gave her a silent well done. She
really did step the awesomeness of this group up by convincing admin to print
colored copies for us.
The boys proudly wrote their names on the cover.
The boys took turns reading the information and the
questions out loud. It got to the point where they were super excited to share
and read. For our next meeting together, instead of sharing as a whole group, I
am going to have them work cooperatively in groups of two taking turns sharing
a story back and forth. I want them to feel heard and have a safe forum to
express themselves, but due to time constraints it isn’t possible to give each
of them that level of one on one interaction for every step of the workbook. But, I am stoked that they had such a good time and were so
completely engaged while working through the first few pages.
questions out loud. It got to the point where they were super excited to share
and read. For our next meeting together, instead of sharing as a whole group, I
am going to have them work cooperatively in groups of two taking turns sharing
a story back and forth. I want them to feel heard and have a safe forum to
express themselves, but due to time constraints it isn’t possible to give each
of them that level of one on one interaction for every step of the workbook. But, I am stoked that they had such a good time and were so
completely engaged while working through the first few pages.
While I was circulating the table checking on everyone’s
progress on the question we were working on, a boy started talking to me
out to turn, I realized I listened and responded.
progress on the question we were working on, a boy started talking to me
out to turn, I realized I listened and responded.
She didn’t. She called them out for calling out.
She held them accountable. She was teaching them respect.
I realized in that moment that by not correcting the boys,
which allows them time to reflect on their actions, I was giving them instant
satisfaction and further instilling their idea that calling out gets you
attention quicker. I was not helping them to master impulse control. In this
scenario and setting, I was hindering their ability to control their impulses.
which allows them time to reflect on their actions, I was giving them instant
satisfaction and further instilling their idea that calling out gets you
attention quicker. I was not helping them to master impulse control. In this
scenario and setting, I was hindering their ability to control their impulses.
That was about to change.
After I had this realization, the next time someone started
blurting, I walked over to them and quietly and respectful told the student, “That
was an example of a callout. I will not respond to a callout. If you would like
to raise your hand and wait, I would be happy to answer you.” He raised his
hand. He patiently waited, by patiently waited I mean frantically shook his
hand at me to the point I thought it might fall off.
blurting, I walked over to them and quietly and respectful told the student, “That
was an example of a callout. I will not respond to a callout. If you would like
to raise your hand and wait, I would be happy to answer you.” He raised his
hand. He patiently waited, by patiently waited I mean frantically shook his
hand at me to the point I thought it might fall off.
I counted to three in my head. Once I hit three, I put him
out of his misery and called on him.
out of his misery and called on him.
He waited the whole time and spoke once I
said his name.
said his name.
She just taught me how to help extinguish call outs from
this little boy.
this little boy.
Impulse control just became a side component to this group.
We worked through the first four pages of the workbook
today. The boys were introduced to the idea that anger can be controlled and
explored how they look and what their body does when they are angry. My
favorite part was the self-portrait.
today. The boys were introduced to the idea that anger can be controlled and
explored how they look and what their body does when they are angry. My
favorite part was the self-portrait.
Aligning with our on-the-fly, new impulse control goals, we
let them each choose three, and only three crayons to create their pictures. If
you wanted to work together to share crayons you could, but the rule is you
could only have three crayons at a time. If you needed a new color, you had to
work as a team and work out some trades. Me forgetting the box of crayons and
having limited crayons in the conference room turned into quite the learning
opportunity for following rules, working cooperatively and sharing. If anyone
asks, I left the box on purpose 😛
let them each choose three, and only three crayons to create their pictures. If
you wanted to work together to share crayons you could, but the rule is you
could only have three crayons at a time. If you needed a new color, you had to
work as a team and work out some trades. Me forgetting the box of crayons and
having limited crayons in the conference room turned into quite the learning
opportunity for following rules, working cooperatively and sharing. If anyone
asks, I left the box on purpose 😛
We were starting to run out of time so I told them for next
week to think about what gets them angry and what they usually do to handle
their anger. I can’t wait to hear the stories they bring next week.
week to think about what gets them angry and what they usually do to handle
their anger. I can’t wait to hear the stories they bring next week.
I asked the boy who said that our group was going to be
boring how he liked it. He gave me a gap toothed grin and a big hug. Yeah, I left with some pep in my step thinking I was pretty
cool. “That kid” learned something from me today and just rewarded me with a
hug.
boring how he liked it. He gave me a gap toothed grin and a big hug. Yeah, I left with some pep in my step thinking I was pretty
cool. “That kid” learned something from me today and just rewarded me with a
hug.
Man I like my job.
Click to find out more information about the Anger Workbook!
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